One day, A street person approached a passer-by and said, “Sir, would you give me $100 for a cup of coffee?”
“That’s ridiculous! Do you think anyone would really pay that much for a cup of coffee?” said the man.
“Just a yes or no, buddy,” the beggar growled.
“I don’t need a lecture about how to run my business.”
A man finds his seat in the theater, but it’s too far from the stage.
He whispers to the usher, “This is a mystery and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and I’ll give you a handsome tip.”
The usher moves him to the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter.
The usher looks at the quarter and then leans over and whispers, “The wife did it.”