The dating world is often harsh and chaotic. Finding somebody who is worthy of your time can be a difficult and dirty job. Nonetheless, we are compelled to enter such an unforgiving world for the sake of the desired outcome: a good relationship. Once you’ve found such a gem of a person and settled nicely into a comfortable relationship, you don’t want to throw it all away with a nasty mis-step. Below are some common relationship killers and how to avoid them.
It is said that a little constructive criticism can be positive. This is the case, of course, for everybody except your girlfriend. Although suggestions are generally considered acceptable, particularly if she asks for them, put downs and unwarranted negative input are expected from her mother, not her lover. If you correct her, tell her how to dress or generally act as though you know best, she will feel self-conscious.
Style is by no means infinitely important, but if you become shabby as soon as you’re comfortable with her, she’ll be sure to keep her distance. If she was attracted to you when you were wearing starched shirts, chances are that’s what she likes, and she may stop being attracted to you if all you wear are t-shirts and dirty jeans.
The more serious you get, the more time you and her spend together. There’s a chance that you might find some of her habits to be not as charming as you thought. So, you find yourself nagging her like she’s your little sister. You act as though you’re annoyed by her every move. You’re not, of course, but you just feel comfortable enough to be blunt. Unfortunately for you, she probably won’t accept this behaviour for a very long period.
Physical cheating is never acceptable unless you and your girl have an agreement about such behaviour, or something like an ‘open relationship’. But cheating isn’t limited only to sexual misconduct – there is a second type of cheating that can be nearly as hurtful. And that’s emotional cheating. This type of cheating applies to very serious relationships in which your girl would expect full disclosure and sharing. It just means that your girlfriend wants to feel like you trust her and confide in her. She doesn’t want to be second-best. And if she is, she’ll notice.
This one is age-old. Many people in relationships are control freaks. You get jealous of her guy friends. You tell her not to spend so much time gossiping with her girl friends. You tell her she spent too much money at the shoe store. Although women have a reputation for being clingy, they also enjoy their independence. Instead of demanding time, ask for it.
Judging her friends and family
If you find her friends, her sister and her mother annoying, you’re going to have an awfully hard time. It’s important to try to see what she sees in them. If you try to see the good things in them, you might actually start to like them.
About the Author:
Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and writes articles about love, dating and relationships. He also offers free dating tips for women and free dating advice for men at his website http://www.datersmanual.com
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